My BFF

friend - ['frend] noun
• a person whom one knows and with whom one has a bond of mutual affection, typically exclusive of sexual or family relation

My Best FRIEND Forever

Who have not heard this infamous line before? It's been repeated time and again in tons of chick flicks movies including my all time favorite and ridiculously funny "White Chicks".
There's even a reality series hosted by Paris Hilton, all in her quest to find her true BFF. What the big deal and how difficult can that be? If Paris Hilton can do it, so can you.

I would like to uncover and discover all my true BFF. True BFF can be as rare a diamonds but I would like to think of them not as sparkly as diamonds but rather as needles. They are extremely useful little tools, comes in different sizes, thickness, length, made of iron or stainless steel. But have you ever tried 'looking for a needle in the haystack' with your bare hands?

Guess what?

Some of us who have tried may have experienced a prick here and there while doing it. On the contrary, those sensitive among us may even get a nasty infection from some rusty old needle. Old friends or new friends, they can be hazardous to our life. We need some kind of a 'metal detector' probably in our brain circuit to decipher what a true friend is. How could you recognized the true color or the worth of a true friend? For me, that challenge is liken to searching for a 'contact lens' in the haystack. Honestly, I have a friend whom I have never been able to guess the color of her eyes as she is always with color contact lenses. For that matter, not even her real hair color! Finding the real 'McCoy' can be a challenge for everyone.

In our materialistic world, to be seen living it up, with a lavish lifestyle, designer clothing, flashy cars, dining at smoochy nightspot will guarantee a line of future BFFs, who think you have got all the right credentials. Not withstanding that you have mortgaged your house to pay for that sleek new car, that your 10 credit cards have been charged to the hilt and they have left countless messages in your brand new 4G IPhone. With this marketable image, you would have dozens queuing up to make it to your friendship list. On the other hand, these external features can hide a multitude of sins. It's hard to uncover the real them, wouldn't it? Everything on them is a facade made out of designer stuff and everything around them is a stage for them to perform. You might not know when they are faking it or when it's for real. BFF are 'dime a dozen'.

Birth, death, divorce, are but a few of these occasions where either your true BFF or the fake ones will surface and chose to be by your side.

On the contrary, someone once told me I would always be alone, without friends as I was too insipid. I also don't have the money to flash around. Life hasn't been as rosy lately but GOD has been loving. Next to GOD, my ever loyal BFF is my mother. I am never ever tired of my mother being my true friend.

Sadly, Bane, a close friend warned me about the coming of friendship fatigue, where in future, friends will be tired of being friends. What a frightening aspect, no friends? So far, I have lost many but I have gain new ones who are giving me their time, support through my rough times. At the moment, I am on the journey only to find only genuine BFF. Recently, I received this saying from a friend where she said, "A friend is one who scatters compassion and all good wishes and not merely gathering everything for themselves while on earth."

YOU! Need not apply for the job of BFF if you don't qualify.

Thank you to all my BFF, I dedicate this to all of you:
Mahi, Bawany, Siti, Nabila, Pat, Karen, Puva, Latha, Miss Wong, David, the families at CLIC, all my doctors friends, the tutors, my wonderful cousin BigOne and my 'sister' Usha. For those I did not name, you can always come to my house while I am still here.

Amused

The 2 mangoes had been a gift from Sita Mami, my sister-in-law’s mother who was visiting from Chennai, India.

As they were harvested early, I had decided to leave them to ripen on the kitchen counter next to my sunny windowsill. (When they were given, I gave my promise to make mango “urugha” pickles but I lost the inspiration.)

Soon dark spots started appearing on it smooth pale green skin, deepening to a golden yellow. What an inviting sight, as the two mangoes beckoned me to reveal their juicy golden flesh. I could not resist the temptation to sink my teeth in it after waiting more than three days.

It is pure meditation in itself, the pleasure of slowly peeling the mango without sacrificing too much of flesh. Alas, those stains of sweetness revealed to me the existence of a rival or two, who has already, beaten me to the trophy.

Nestling inside, are two young-lings whom have been left in this cocoon of love by its mother. With plenty of food and protection, all the beetles had to do is to finish their life cycle, to seek freedom to do what their species had been doing since their existence in the universe.

Thereafter burrowing out of the safe haven, they will seek the new season's fragrant mango blossoms, and the cycle of life continues for them. Unfortunately they did not anticipate their journey to a foreign land and the invasion of their privacy.

Luck was not on their side, two excitable squeamish teens, mistaken them for cockroaches decided to snuffed the lives out of these two innocent beetles. Always the opportunist I had planned to turn this find into a mini insect study project, if it weren't for the two "Jedis".

Life is too short for these beetle and even chance evaded me.

Tiny black beetle youngling or two

left on their own without a single clue.

Bugs and flesh, scooped out by a giant spoon

poor little bugs evicted out off their cocoon

A pity, preyed by young warrior,

whose eyes and ears are without fears.

With tiny wings they tried to flee,

alas, only in death will they be free.

One more mango left on the windowsill,

wonder what I will discover still.

War of the Roses

Weddings,
an occasion where everyone joins in your celebration of happiness, and I mean everyone, especially in Asia.(Due to the culture and hospitality practiced in South-east Asia, gate crashing to weddings are not unheard of - View
Monsoon Wedding 2002.)

In fact, at your wedding dinner, this momentous occasion, you will meet many whom you are familiar and many you are not. Of course, the auspicious day will be even more memorable if the menu is outstanding, serving the desirable Sharks fin Scallop Consomme during the wedding banquet. The 8-10 courses menu and the merry-making will hit a high note of "Yam Sing" to toast your occasion of a lifetime. And finally, an avalanche of blessings to guarantee your marriage for the next 50 years and more.

STOP! FAST FORWARD!
20 years later,
You spouse asked for a divorce.
Emotionally dumbfounded as you had envisioned yourself spending a lifetime with him or her, you hit a blank wall not knowing how to respond. It is true that many marriages do constantly face more than the occasional hiccups, ride the roller-coasters and face the stormy seas and tidal waves. After all, a marriage unites two people from two rather diversified background with different personalities, and sometimes racially, socially and culturally different. As a result, the lives of the newlyweds are now entwined forever into the extended family of mother/father-in-law, sister, brothers, aunts and uncles and sometimes a whole community.

But what builds a relationship and what brings it down?
Truth no #1,
"Sharing is caring" and vice versa.
Being emotionally, mentally and even physically connected is highly important. Speaking and sharing truthfully from the heart between two people make the relationship bloom much like the 'lotus rising from the mud' despite the stress and the grind of our modern lifestyle. One has to display honesty in their actions or else everything turns into one suspicious mess. Truth and honesty is the glue that bonds the relationship. Communicating with your partner means you are friends foremost and that you have found a lifelong confidante. That's more important that being a wife or a husband.

Anything more that you offer to your partner is because you love each other and using a 'calculator' to define your relationship is stupid and detrimental. Remember the guy, Harold in 'Joy Luck Club' who scrutinized every single expenses his wife, Lina and he spent. Like leaky batteries, this will corrode any long term relationship. Being calculative in your relationship doesn't strengthen the marital bond and it's downright petty.

I was brought up differently, unfortunately not everyone share my sentiments. For me, it's the everyday small things that reminds me of how valuable the relationship is. For others, a more outward materialistic exhibition is desirable. I guess I am not comfortable being that kind of person. I would like to do things out of love not just a sense of duty, for that I might as well demand a salary. Anyway another 50 years down the road is a long time for anyone to be petty about what or how many gifts had been given. After all, I have pretty much given myself away for the past 20 years. So the next 20 to 30 is all for myself to share with whoever I want to.

So, I am less than perfect, ... you?
Unfortunately some are deemed never to rise to the expectations of others unless we go through a total genetic transformation or some form of blood letting or blood transfusion. I have nothing against immersing into my newly acquired socially and culturally diverse new ground, neither am I adverse to multiculturalism. After all,
I was born and bred in Malaysia where multiculturalism thrives. I've even learned a new tongue, a smattering of Tamil which is much appreciated by my close Indian friends. Coupled with a repertoire of South Indian Brahmin dishes which I am very proud of cooking and love. I have even done the unthinkable, according to my mother, that is to give up meat, to become a vegetarian.To change and to give up is because I want to conform, in this case hopefully it will make me more acceptable to my new family, but is it worth it? You can never please anybody least of all everyone!

I am a rebel?
And yes, I am still not quite comfortable wearing a Saree.That's because I still don't know how to wear one but not because I didn't like it. The Saree issue in fact exploded in a sort of political unrest and I was branded as anti-Indian. To add salt to the wound, my inability to fit into the Indian woman's circle puts me out of favor. Not a terribly good conversationalist on topics like what is the latest Saree fashion, who is the up and coming movie star and who has acquired a new house totally made me an outcast. As the saying goes, either you are in or your are out. I could carry on facade and be a FAKE, something I wasn't good at being. My mother taught me to be true to myself, or otherwise be burdened with a lie for the rest of my life. With my brand of honesty means I am not popular but hey, I not in for the Mrs Popularity contest. So maybe, my husband should have invested in some social etiquette class to give me the finishing touch. Unfortunately I had spent the last 20 years carving career directions for us and raising two young kids and first five getting to know my in-laws. These issues seem trivial to many but they are real. It may not give rise to problems in the first few 'honeymoon' years but unless you arrest them it will haunt you years later, just like mine. Regrets? Yes and no.

Truth no#2
Erosion ...?
This is not a geography lesson! All of us face pressures, some are positive and challenges us to be achievers but the negative ones only does what it is not. It strips us off our dignity, our spirit and break us into pieces, that includes marital bonds. If a burgeoning river are not controlled, it could even sweep off the whole 'village' causing fatalities. Unreasonable expectations, snide comments are like constant flowing river that can erode and rewrite your destiny as a married couple. Even if it's done with the best intentions. So it's best for most of us to hold our tongue, not to offer unsound advices as it can worsen any situations.

Ugly Reality ... War of the Roses?
Divorce is a lonesome journey...
The word 'divorce' is both taboo and ugly. It makes you bitter, angry, unforgiving, depressive and the worst is when you blame the whole affair on yourself. Suddenly you start self-evaluating yourself with torrents of questions. WHY? Could you have foreseen it coming or could you have done something to prevent it? Facing the reality of a 'marital shipwreck', you started to round up the survivors, gathering anything that are vital to you and those who depended on you for survival. Forget about the 100 year old Persian carpet or the antiques figurines. One thing for sure, you know you cannot turn back the clock. Time is ticking away for those traumatized especially the kids and they are no sponge either. Shame on any who thinks kids are sponges, that they will bounce back and will readjust to the break-up and that they will come out victoriously happier. That's because they are not your kids and you're not the one
having a divorce.

YES!
... the lawyer is right behind

Seek proper legal advice. Finding one who will not make mincemeat out of you and your ex-spouse is crucial. Talk to someone you can trust, a councilor, a therapist and even WAO Malaysia. In times like these, you will find out how genuine your friends are. Some of them are bystanders, some cheerleaders, some are sympathizers, but a rare few will put their friendship at risk, sacrifice their own time and energy to help you. I am blessed to know there are still some good people around, and they are not necessary my family. My friends are the family I have for now.

A friend wrote this email to me, "I envy your new found independence and that you will no longer need to carry that weight around you. Chin up, march ahead.Your
children are the most precious and they are here with you" A truly strong admonishment and coming from one who is happily married for almost 30 years. This wisdom showed me a different perception to my new path.
... but my kids and I, we are not alone.

The story of God's footprint
A man was facing troubled times but he was comforted by the fact that God
was always there for him, obvious by the extra set of footprints in the sand next to his. As his problems escalated, he realized only one set of prints was seen. The man started accusing God of abandoning him. God then lovingly explained that during the tumultuous times, it was not the man's footprint on the sand but God's, as God was there carrying and comforting him throughout.

Allo-allo, Moshi-moshi

Gone will be those days where I would snub, spit or spat at telemarketers who always happen to spring upon me when I am busy sorting out things at home with the kids, which means I am either spewing smoke or coughing out blood. (A typical Chinese way of describing extreme stress.)

I assure you, my opinion have not been coerced out of me, neither have I gone nuts, nor are under the influence of drugs or received any godly revelations. Only it's because I have joined the world of the TELEMARKETERS.

For a good 2 weeks, since mid March, I have been working in the a French hotel group as a telemarketer. I convinced myself, that whoever works in this profession doesn't need to be a rocket scientist, so with guts of steel and a gung-ho spirit, I settled into my new job.

Guess what?

It's the toughest job ever in this world. First, you will need the face of Sylvester Stallone, the body of Arnold Schwarzenegger and lastly, the prowess of Monica Lewinsky to sell your services or products. You need to be more than a rocket scientist. Like a chameleon, one has to assume many roles, sometimes a therapist, finance manager, personal shopper all roll into one YOU.

On top of that , you need the voice of a chanteuse, a UN translator (speaking many languages is a boon)and the ability to roll out hotel room rates at the snap of you fingers. Having good looks doesn't count as nobody can see you, they are on the other side, for goodness sake!

Trust our American marketing expert to come up with scripted sales pitch to assist you in your first day of work. I find myself fumbling and mumbling for awhile before I got the upper hand. Still, I could not escape making incoherent sales talk especially in the first hour of the morning when my "engine" did not warm up readily (When the brain doesn't connect to your tongue).

Alas, you have to sell the same product everyday and that can be a damper to your spirit. You will then need to cultivate the temperament of the lark in order to make your conversation as natural and chirpy every single day. That's is not an easy feat. Firstly, is convincing them to part with their money for something they can't see. Then, getting them to reveal their credit card number to seal the deal is like getting the oyster to spit out the pearl and without getting your fingers pinched.

Yes, these hard working people deserves more respect from us. This is my personal oath, that I'll try to be gentler, kinder, more understanding and supportive when I pick up the phone next time YOU call.

Want to play or not? Yes, albeit the bad English, that was how as children, we approached the topic of play. Nothing has changed very much since, until the arrival of computers. Computer games like Nintendo,PlayStation, PSP etc have since changed forever our kid's idea of fun and entertainment. They no longer need to play in groups as their choice of interactive partner is reduced to a machine, chips, disk and memory cards.

Computer expert they have become. On the downside, they have turned into social nerds, hermit, outcast as they spend so much time with themselves. At the most, only one more child will join them in the odyssey of fun.

Back to this morning, playing wasn't planned this morning. We had organized an outing of breakfast, then to an early morning movie with an old friend of ours. Since that failed, I reminded Siddharth maybe there was an unfinished chore to attend to at home, which was scrubbing the foldaway mattress.

Out came the high pressure host and the bottle of Holy Cow. They swept the yard, cleaned of dried leaves and twigs, cleared the area and started hosing. As Siddharth has done this quite a number of times, this was an easy task. Next, with the mattress was finally hung up and shouts of," Wrap up everything and get ready for lunch .....", Junju came running and asked " Could we spray ourselves with the hose?".

What a blast they were having the whole morning. They hosed themselves and everything in sight wet. The child in me would have love to join in the fun if I did not have the house to attend to. Both soaked to their bare skin, giggling, laughing, screaming, shouting and of course the unavoidable bantering between brother and sister was obvious. Of course, shouts of "I hate you", " see what you did .... cause me to fall down", could be heard but that could easily be silenced by "this is great fun and the best morning I've ever had", when everything ended.

Yes, that's what real fun is, simple joy of spending time, sharing love and sibling bonding. Etching memories that will withstand the good times and bad,

Fun is rather priceless, isn't it. So, want to play or not? Please say yes.

Still unschooling or not??

Whenever another homeschooling parent asked me if I have or am I using a particular school curriculum, my answer would always get a puzzling response.

What or how do I teach them? Do I follow the Singapore, British or the American syllabus? Occasionally, after answering all their queries, I look into the mirror and ask myself do I really know what I am doing at all? 8 months have past since April, the kids and I have made some headwind in our homeschooling journey.

Coupled with tremendous willpower, we decided to make changes in our studying habits and techniques. As a result, unnecessary study materials have been replaced with more suitable ones covering a wider variety of topics and musical activities, given more prominence in our daily routine. Unfortunately, the few tutors who did not share my sentiments have been given a sent off. I am grateful for their service but they are best suited for other children. Expertise and experience are not the only criteria for holistic imparting of knowledge.

So it's back to the drawing board to look for Mr, Mrs, Miss Right Teacher for these young minds. As the saying goes, ..."Seek and you shall find." It's definitely about finding the person who understands your perspective and appreciating that life is more than chasing for paper qualification but ultimately, nourishing the 'mind and spirit'.

Finally, progress ...

Both the kids were enrolled in the EDISON language program, ran by the delightful Miss Amy Delphino and her team of capable teachers. The results have been amazingly satisfying and we have already enrolled for the next level in January 2010.

In the meanwhile, I have started using websites such as the British Museum, Geography 4kids, Surfing the net with kids, which offer research materials and the all important games for free. These interactive games will guarantee to get kids thinking with lots of fun thrown in. So, check it out!

Aside from some serious studying, we have started some simple art and craft projects. The first was pebble/rock painting and next, we quickened the pace in our ongoing scrapbook project. For pebble painting, all we did was to purchase some inexpensive PLAKA acrylic paints, which by the way was on offer and cleaned up rocks from our garden. With some easy internet tutorials, the kids came up with some designs, creating their own masterpieces. Doing the scrapbook is a bit costly but we tried using scraps of paper from old stuffs we found around the house. But at the same time, found a bookstore in Taman Tun that has a nifty haberdashery section selling a wide range of trimmings/ribbons & lace, buttons, papers and knick-knacks.

All would not be possible without huge doses of imagination, creativity, passion which came from the magnificent organ, our BRAIN.


P.S. Remember those dictation days we had in school, it's a great way for mom to take a break while the kids teach themselves reading, spelling, handwriting and even drawing. Let them grade and comment on their own ability. Try this and watch them have fun!

The Internet - Super Highway

Yes, I am back again, after 2 month of absence. Certainly I have been spending the bulk of my time reading about Malaysia's latest political controversies on The Malaysian Insider and Malaysiakini more than anything else.

Hey, who can deny the intriguing 'sandiwara' currently on air and on the internet. Our politicians are now becoming well-known, aren't they? Their humour and comical antic can rival those of the Taiwan ministers during many of their infamous senate sittings. Of course many of us have are familiar with our very our own drama, " The Ripping of the Perak Speaker's Robe" for instance. In fact, our politicians could well audition for the adult version of 'Kids Say the Darnest Thing' for shooting their mouths off so very often. If that fails, they could try 'Mind Your Language', the good o'l British sitcom, at least everyone practice speaking English and get along jolly well with Mr Brown. It is all centered on this principle "don't engage mouth before brain is in gear"

As a result, I detoxed myself from Astro's 'Asian Food Channel', my lifeline (I am a food stylist!) and detached myself from my 'lifeguru' Miss Oprah Winfrey. I am now completely addicted and hooked onto this new 'drug', the internet news. Reading The Malaysian Insider has become my morning coffee and Malaysiakini my toast 'n' bacon. The family can wait! Or they can walk over to Lotus for their 'thosai' or 'roti canai'. The downside of being online this much has caused me to overuse my monthly internet package, ever since the 'All the President's Men' (MIC, MCA, DAP, PKR, UMNO, GERAKAN, MAKKALSAKTHI) series started.

Much of my time is spent searching for political videos of opposition member being punched, cow's head dragged on streets, protesters sprayed by water canons, 'beauty suing the beast', the deadly tsunamis and typhoons, all happening and vying for my attention, at the same time. In the meanwhile, our local bigshots continue to play the 'Deal or No Deal' game.

The INTERNET is a great force with immense resources. The SUPER ALL POWERFUL tool! It is two dimensional, the 'good and the dark side'. The good side, we can learn, read, view, hold a conference, chat, talk to our families, run a business, buy lipstick, email, chat mail, post home-made video all on the net. Practically everything, except eat the machine itself. But wait, didn't they invent the prototype that can send smells & scents over the net provided you buy a particular software? On the dark side, bad news of corrupt politicians whose scams can be read ahead of your daily morning paper. I'm afraid newspapers are soon to be redundant.

For us homeschoolers, it provides hours of fun 'n' games, history, science, geography materials and help us to connect to the rest of the homeschooling community.

In the meantime, life goes on as normal as we can. We will wait and see what happens next as all of us are tuned on the current episode of 'Deal or No Deal'. The suspense is going to kill all of us, while anticipating the risky outcome.

My "Moove..ment"

"Movement" : a group of people working together to advance their shared political, social or, artistic ideas.

Most of us champion our ideas everyday, right from the breakfast table down to the company meeting room and even in the bedroom. We suggest, propose, coerce as well as argue to have our thoughts or ideas accepted and implemented.

Many do not understand the course that we are fighting for or simply WHY we do it? Living in the real world, "walking into the blank wall" frequently happens but some of us may not willingly "throw in the towel" when faced with such negative responses. Faith, conviction and perseverance are the motivating factor for anyone who has a course to fight.

So,
what's my movement ?

1. Saving our planet earth
It started 4 years ago when I brought back reusable bags from a supermarket chain in Melbourne and started using them everyday. I highlighted this concept to the newly opened supermarket in Bangsar and soon the ideas caught on like wildfire. They had replicated both the Coles bag and the chiller bag which I saw 2 years earlier in France.

I earnestly congratulate Bangsar Village Grocer for having the guts to pioneer and start this recycling movement. (Of course, all other hypermarket and supermarket started riding "pillion" on this recycle, reuse wave.) I wasted no time suggesting that they should also charge for plastic shopping bags as practiced in some European and one Asian country, though I did have to wait awhile for that to happen.

This August, they managed to surprise me with their "no plastic bags" campaign.
Well done !! Hopefully the lackadaisical but "kiasu"attitude of many Malaysian would change to make the earth litter free.

2. Live, eat healthy, organically.
The human race has never been so poisoned, ever. Polluted air, earth, water and food among all. We have to installed air cleaner, ionizer, water purifier, sanitizer, all in the quest to keep a pollutant-free home. So, shouldn't we have the same concern for what goes into our body? Unfortunately, eating organic food products seem to be unaffordable for many. In the past, mainly terminal illness patients were seen promoting the organic as well as the macro-biotic life-style. Not many of us were convinced. Unfortunately it has to takes the current surge of diseases, eg: heart, digestive, toddler allergy, wheat allergy, milk allergy and a host of other ailments to act as the wake-up call for many.

Modern medical diagnostic methods have also enable us to improve ill health otherwise tolerated by the sufferers for years.

A good example is my eldest who suffers from milk allergy which escalates to a severe sinus problems if unchecked. Although I have resorted to giving him organic oat milk I realized that milk alone may not be the culprit. Additives in processed milk, food fed to commercially- raised dairy cows and the environment could be one of the many reasons. With a series of medical test, a bit of food detective work (keeping food journal) and diet restructuring, my family now consumes about 80-90% organic food.

YES, they look and taste different....
Organic vegetables come with the hint of earthiness which many may have forgotten or never experienced. Root vegetables (carrots, potatoes, turnip, celery, parsley) simply taste deliciously sweet. What an incredible sensation to your taste bud as you bite into it. None of that unnatural sweetness of non-organic vegetables.
(eg: commercially grown carrots are genetically spliced to have a higher sugar content.) They may not look perfect but you do spend less time washing of all the pesticide residue. They are less wastage as you don't need to peel the skin of the carrots, apples, cucumbers where an incredible amount of nutrition is stored.
Kids can safely benefit from eating vegetable in its natural raw state.
but
Please don't take my word, instead do your research before making up your mind to go organic. The good news is, prices are coming down, becoming competitive compared to the mass grown produces and may be cheaper than imported vegetables. More outlets are being established in and around KL, PJ, Subang, offering discounts for regulars customers as well. Buying organic spices, fish or poultry, grains, flour, eggs, baby product, Chinese herbs, detergent right down to cosmetics are not an issue.

The organics lifestyle change, I admit is not for everyone at the moment. Regardless, do take a moment to consider the future we will be leaving for our children...

Eggs, Egg, Eggless

Personally I adore eggs. Scrambled, pan-fried, deep-fried (as in Sambal Telur), soft-boiled even the occasional hard-boiled, I simply love my eggs. My signature breakfast is my egg white omelet with mushroom, plum tomatoes, shredded potatoes spiced with chili, cumin and coriander. Going meatless for me clearly narrows down my option for finding food with a good source of protein, nutrition and taste other than the overly publicized TOFU or soy protein powder.

Recently, eggs have been a welcomed option in our family meals. On days that the kids feel like skipping breakfast, a "special" will be served. It's a hot cup of organic oat milk with an organic egg whisked in till frothy, sprinkled with a dash of cinnamon powder and sweetened with honey.

When I feel indulgent and in need of a little palate pampering, it's definitely the french toast. Slices of danish dipped in vanilla scented egg/milk concoction, grated orange zest, pan-fried to golden perfection and served with maple syrup for the kids. Of course, I enjoy mine simply, with a dash of cinnamon sugar, paired with a cup of Earl Grey.

If there are awards to be given in the super-food category, eggs would get my vote. Growing up in a Chinese home, I've always enjoyed eggs cooked in different ways. Braised tea eggs, eggs custard with mincemeat (chicken eggs, century eggs and salted eggs), chives and egg frittata, fish 'n' egg rolls, barley egg drop "tongsui" just to name a few.

Aside from being a gourmand's choice, eggs have their "other" uses eg: treatment of fever, bruises, bumps in traditional medicine. According to old wives tales and Chinese customs, a hard-boiled egg inserted with a copper coin will draw out toxins from a feverish patient. Rubbing the patient's abdomen will bring down a fever. Nowadays I use the ice-gel bag for fever, microwave bead bag for my aches and pains. If nothing else works, pop some pain killers or consult the doctor.

Unfortunately, eggs have a rather unfavorable position in my husband's family. For any vegetarian who hails from southern India, eggs are considered somewhat taboo however garlic and onions are acceptable. For all the right reasons, the queenly egg will never grace any of our family meals. In the past, during the occasional birthday of any family member, traditional sweetmeats were served. All that has now been overshadowed by the glamor of having a western cake. A cake would be ordered from one of the few Indian ladies who made egg-less cake in the neighborhood. Often they came overly decorated, piled with icing made from margarine in the most unhealthy way.

So the last straw over the camel's back was the horrible soggy cake I had during my friend's party. It was the start of my journey to discover a new horizon in the quest for the egg free cakes.

My very first attempt at egg-less cakes was the strawberry coconut muffin. Then the pandan cupcake and the very challenging semolina cake. Dolly the neighborhood specialist , used to sell her sugee (another way of calling semolina) cake in the neighborhood supermarket and it's always been my hot favorite. The semolina cake is a popular Ceylonese recipe, a rich and decadent masterpiece requiring about half a dozen eggs to make. Many love the richness of this particular cake. To others having sensitive noses, the smell of the eggs is repulsive, let alone eating them. As they say, one man's meat is certainly another man's poison!!

Through trials, errors and countless web searching, I've managed to tweak many cake recipes, turning them eggfree. A foodie friend (He owns 5 restaurant) couldn't even tell the difference with the lemon poppyseed cake. Of course, using good quality ingredient, having the right combination in taste, texture, and the look of the finished product is so very important. The bravado of matching exotic ingredients that goes against traditional ideas can result in newer and sophisticated flavors too. All these I hope, will convince you that the egg-free cake you are biting into is as delicious as the rest.

My next quest? Definitely molecular gastronomy and for that I will have to pick the brain of my dear friend, Chef Horst Futterer.

RAT-A-TAT-TAT

Talk about luck, we've been 2x lucky catching these pesky rats. The first was caught just before we left for HCMC. As the chief domestic vigilante, I noticed the presence of unusual droppings in my backyard. Between Uncle Sam and myself, we saw two types of droppings. One slightly green probably excrement from a "vegetarian" and the other dark blackish grainy ones.

Yes, I caught Mr Grasshopper, the vegetarian with my own bare hands. Mr Grasshopper has been voraciously chewing up my water reeds silently for weeks before he was detected. Fat from eating nutrient-rich leaves and housed in a cool shaded foliage, it was almost 5 inches when he was caught. By far the largest I've ever came across.

Back to the rat, I dug out our rust resistant rat cage, smothered a good amount of peanut butter onto a piece of multi-grain bread and placed it at the corner of our backyard. Why peanut butter, you may ask, why not belacan, ikan bilis or cheese?

Many myths about its favorite food have been perpetuated by cartoons and movies. The most outstanding would be the "cheese with holes", the famous Swiss Emmenthal cheese. But if you are looking for the perfect bait, take the recommendation from the Discovery Channel documentary on rats, the peanut butter.

The peanut butter bait have succeeded in trapping the rats, not once, not twice but three times, the last was the juvenile rat. I have a feeling there is a last member hiding in my roof space. The "dead giveaways" are the incessant scratching and squeaking at night. Pardon my pun.

Beware Rattus Rattus!! I have plenty of delicious peanut butter and bread, my alluring spread awaits you.

Greener grass on the other side of Vietnam

Property and construction business are booming. More international 5 stars hotels (both Hilton and Sofitel) are currently under construction. Domestic economy and consumption has increased. Foreign goods and cars (including the new hybrid cars) are easily available if you have the money, of course. Locals are heading toward jewelry outlets to invest in gold to deck themselves with this precious commodity. TV programs on 10 local TV channels are aired throughout the day and if variety is what you demand, subscribe Cable TV. Elsewhere, a sure sign that time is good is the mushrooming of restaurants dishing out local (Pho 24 and Wrap n Roll are some home grown success selling Vietnamese noodle and fresh rice rolls) and western cuisine and designer cafe bars.

Sipping coffee at Mojo's of Sheraton was my last trip's favorite as it was the place to people watch. It's a favorite of the young upper crust in the Vietnamese society where they are decked out with the latest Parisian bag, diamond encrusted Rolex, IPOD and wheeled in by fancy cars. If that's not your cup of "coffee", you could order their delicious cakes and desserts. This time around Kimchi (She is chief strategist in an international media firm) took us to the cafe bar close to her office, Ban Sonate Cafe at District 1. It's an oasis that comes with free wi-fi, furnished with comfortable couches nestled in a serene background of tropical foliage, waterfall, rock garden and designer garden chairs and some cute ornamental ducks in the garden.

The Vietnamese coffee bar are not for the Starbuck's die hard where they order, collect and go. Enjoying a good cup of "Vietnamese drip coffee" will mean dedicating a good amount of time waiting for the brew to drip through tiny holes into your cup filled with a small amount of condensed milk. In the meanwhile, what can you do? Kick your legs up, sit back, relax and indulge in sweet talks, office gossip or do nothing. If you are alone, you can always go back to your boring activity of working on your laptop. With an extensive menu of coffees, tea, light snacks it certainly hard to choose. As I was having one of my sinus attack, I had to decline the cup of coffee and ordered ginger tea. Thoroughly relax after my drink, all that I have to do is to soak in the surrounding, filled with the rippling sound of the water of the artificial river that runs at the back of the upper level of the cafe.

The younger generation have embraced coffee culture not just in the city but all over Vietnam. In Da Lat(capital of Lam Dong Province), in the central highland, cafes lined up along main roads. All serving the requisite cup of drip coffee served hot or with ice. Coffee are an important commodity introduced by the French and Vietnam is the second largest producer in the world after Brazil. In Da Lat, coffee is considered the king of beverage but tea are definitely the queen.

Jasmine tea, Green tea, lotus tea, oolong tea, artichoke tea are very, very popular. The mild, cool temperate climate is the best reason to have a constant warm-me-up drink, which is the tea. Vietnam's domestically driven economy has made Da Lat a major producer and supplier of temperate fruits and vegetables all the way down to Ho Chi Min City.

In Cho Da Lat(Da Lat Market), the morning market is swarming with locals and buzzing with activities of buying and selling. Mulberries, strawberries, apple custard, artichoke, avocado grown here are arranged in a orderly manner to show of their best. Fresh peas of all sorts are picked and shelled, carrot, radishes, green papayas daintily hand shredded, ready to be sold and taken home for that infamous green papaya salad, Stalls selling an assortments of herbs and salad leaves such as butterhead, endive, watercress, basil, spearmint, perilla leaves, forest ferns as a condiment for fresh rice paper rolls. Fresh tofu, fresh rice noodles, fresh rice paper, cherry eggplants, roma tomatoes, pink potatoes, straw mushrooms, eggs, rabbit, quails, pate, ham, roasted pork, fresh living seafood and so much more ....... ( I will leave some to your imagination or you can check the pictures I have uploaded). After that, walk over to the wine, spices, pickles and preserves corner. Here, you will also find a variety of bulbs such as garlic, some as tiny as a kidney bean together with shallots of different colors.

A walk through the Cho Da Lat(the market is about the size of a football stadium) will by now arouse hunger growls from your stomach. Smell the food and take the stairs in the center building block where hawker stalls are situated. Similar to the Pudu market, the food court sells local food from Pho to steam dumplings, baguette sandwich, rice, vegetables, hot and cold drinks as well as desserts. For vegetarians, the options are far better than the regular family restaurant in Da Lat town. No tummy ache eating street food.

By now, with tummies satisfied, visit the myriad arrangements of flowers located in the front of the block. A prestigious spring flower festival every April herald Da Lat as the main producer of temperate flowers such as hydrangea, lilies, roses, orchids, peonies and etc. Head towards the preserved nuts and fruit section to sample popular items like ginger, soursop and tamarind candies. Do buy some mulberry or strawberry gum sweets and famous artichoke tea to take home. Practice bargaining prices just for the fun of it but the language barrier is pretty obvious. It is very difficult to find anyone speaking English and if at all with their accent, you might as well use sign language.

What about the nightlife? More al fresco cafes and a lively pasar malam carnival like atmosphere. Cardigan and scarves are the norm dress code as the night temperature dips low. Downtown Da Lat square turns into a pedestrian mall on Saturday and Sunday with al fresco dining, live art and music performance as well as horse carriage riding for families. In the windy night, the smell of freshly grilled dried cuttlefish and corn permeates the lakeside air. I glimpsed the lady carrying the "kandar" stick and wondered what everyone was eating. Hot steamy bowls of silken taufu far with pure molasses syrup boiled with young ginger and topped with a spoonful of coconut cream. It was the most heavenly manna I have ever eaten and so deliciously simple, all for less than RM1.

A non-stop frenzy of wheeling and dealing from morning till night. Motorbikes and taxis abound in the one way streets of booming Da Lat. The resourcefulness and the political circumstances have resulted in a strong local economy that is positive and thriving. Even in such a small town, infrastructure are pretty well planned, city folks like Pius and Kimchi have bought property here both as an investment and second home. With such a positive prediction and the spring climate, of course, who wouldn't.

Most Vietnamese are very contented with the current economic environment and more overseas Vietnamese have chosen to return to live and work. Likewise many expatriates have chosen to start businesses and live here as well. LG, a Penangite, married to Wade a chiropractor from USA has opened a practice in HCMC for more than two years. In a rare and bizarre situation, Vietnam is probably the only country where our friend wears gold bracelet the size of a watch strap. a necklace thicker than a rope and still feel safe. Capital punishment have kept crime rate from escalating in such a bustling city. Yes, there are some downside of a communist regime but no government is ever perfect.

Wish I can feel the same living in Bangsar. But what an experience I've had for the past 6 days in Vietnam. Having travel to Hanoi, Hue, Hoi An to HCMC and now Da Lat, I have enjoy the best of all Vietnam.

Good night, Vietnam!

Good Morning Vietnam!

All of us have been counting the days since we bought our air tickets in March. Come 17th June, we will be in Ho Chi Min City, staying with our dearest friend, Pius and KimChee. We are still talking about our first trip though it 's been two years. Junju is still excitable about the food, the trip to the Bamboo Park and riding on Uncle Pius' motorbike. For her, it's been one of the most thrilling holidays she's ever had.

First and foremost it was the adventure of riding on a motorbike for the first time. Of course, had I known they had gone without wearing safety helmets, I would have stop them. Alarmed I was, but the millions of cyclists in HCMC obviously do not adhere to the safety rules as the local government does not enforce them. Bicycles and motorbikes swarmed the city of HCMC everyday. They are a common mode of transportation for both human and animals. We have come across riders carrying chicken, pet birds and even dog all over the city. (Of course, both chicken and dog eventually ends up in the market as food). The kids have certainly enjoyed the adrenalin rush riding pillion on Uncle Pius' Suzuki.

As HCMC is not known for kids oriented activities like, museums with dinosaur skeletons or mummies, Uncle Pius suggested swimming. The swimming facility was nestled in a beautifully landscaped garden with fishing lakes and a restaurant. The kids had a smashing time and even made some new friends. But definitely no more motorcycle adventure! We'll be taking taxis from now on. (HCMC many outstanding war-based museums may not appeal to energetic impatient kids too young in ages. You're far better off taking them to Cu Chi Tunnel where they will have a time of their life pretending to be soldiers especially if they are boys. It's a good opportunity for older kids to do some videoing, if not do bring your notebooks and still camera. Lots of great moments here!)

Taxi service are time-saving and efficient way to get around in HCMC. Uncle Pius and KimChee depends on them daily as oppose to having their own car and driver which requires additional liability such as insurance. Streets in HCM central business district are narrow and most are one way street, making it all the more difficult to find a parking box. VERY SUSAH if you don't have a driver that waits and picks up as soon as you are done with whatever you are doing. Likewise, the thought of taking public buses quickly diminished as we are limited by our inability to speak Vietnamese.

So we indulged ourselves by taking taxis everyday and enjoyed them thoroughly as we would not have this opportunity back in KL. It was cheaper and more efficient that KL. We struggled to converse and memorizing Uncle Pius' home address was the only few we've managed. Till today, we can count on it to provide a good laugh as recalling the address in Vietnamese is soooo... hilarious. That's because Vietnamese words don't sound the way they are written at all. The kids gave it a good try for days and kids being kids, they are so gungho about learning new things especially if they are funny.

So Uncle Pius suggested going to the Bamboo Park. What an incredible surprise the Bamboo Park was. Again, beautifully landscaped with of course, lots and lots of bamboo plants. Everything is made from bamboo, the giant swing(I really mean GIANT), see-saw, the windmill, the merry-go-round etc. Everything is layout in a tropical garden with fish and lotus pond reminiscence of a traditional Vietnamese village. It is so nostalgic and picturesque that couples considered it to be a key location to have their wedding pictures taken there. Armed and escorted with hair, make-up artist and professional photographer, it was such a sight. We counted more than 20 over couples including one with a foreign groom, who almost fell out from a tree branch overhanging across the pond. Another sat in a traditional boat or sampan dressed in traditional Vietnamese wedding gown. Now, that's is what we called the "Universal Studio" in the most natural setting.

After "rubbing shoulders" with all the beautiful brides and grooms, we sat ourselves in a quite corner of a local cafe to sample a traditional "burnt rice crust pie" and some tea.

We would love to share more quirky moments in HCMC with you but we exit now with a short home video of the Bamboo Garden ......

The Stepford Wives

I think most of us are familiar with these words, stylista, fashionista and lately recessionista. We are blasted with these bombastic terms on TV, the fashion news, web and the fashion business pages. ( The recessionista are fashionista, who due to the temporary economic situation actually recycle their expensive hoards of designer clothes or buy labels from lesser known designers. This will boost the image of lesser known fashion designer and increase their business. By the time the recession is over, the price of clothing by them, now made famous by those recessionista will be beyond our reach. So, we are back to buying clothes of the rack for most of us. One of those vicious cycles that never end.)

Stylista, fashionista or recessionista, I am not one but I am close to pioneering a new groupie called the "ORGANIZTA". No, it's not Russian, Hungarian or even remotely Romanian human right organization. (It's a slang originating from the word "organize", from the Latin word "organum" or "organizare" and means to arrange in order, to coordinate or to group using "tools".)

Succumbing to the fashion trends, I do not. Only a confession of my weakness for all home gadget and having absolutely no resistant not even to a pair of chopsticks. For those fashionitas out there, imagine staring at a pair of Jimmy Choo's 6-inch Stilettos and trying to tear yourself away. For that reason my daughter enthroned me with the title the "Home Gadget Queen of 151".

You will find the best kitchen knives and accessories (Ahem ... GLOBAL knives) BAMIX hand blender, WILTON silicon bakewares, SALTER weighing scale, Villeroy crockeries and etc in my queenly domain, my kitchen of course. (I have been known to carry ethnic brass and copper cooking pots all the way from China, I am quite unstoppable.)

In order to keep them in place, the queen needs her "essentials". Guess where the Home Queen hunts for these. My hunting grounds extend from IKEA, JayaJusco, MetroJaya, Isetan eg. to the more down to earth (I mean down to earth prices) 100 Yen Store, to the latest in the market which is DAISO JAPAN.

Super "kawaii" cute Japanese imports are available at Daiso at super low prices of RM5.00. ( A surprised shopper came to me and asked for confirmation.) A huge variety of products ranging from Japanese to Western-style table wares, kitchen wares, bathroom accessories, wardrobe organizers, cosmetic to stationary even gardening and hardwares are available. Of course the ever important BOXES that comes in different sizes, colors and materials.

Everything is beautifully crafted, designed and coordinated to help any proud homemakers make their home perfect like those "Stepford Wives". Certainly a tribute to the Japanese (more like Japanese men) who introduced this culture to all of us.

Their sophisticated culture have resulted in everything near perfect. Daily rituals so evident from their manners right down to their food presentation, their impeccable simple fashion sense to home wares to electronic gadgets make us gasp in awe. (Remember their invention of the perfect toilet bidet? The bidet that washes and air-dries your derriere after you done your business and flushes automatically. If you are still not convinced, visit a handicraft store, a pastry store in Tokyo and you will wonder why. The very fact that they recovered from a devastating ww2 to become a super modern nation speaks for itself.)

Back to DAISO. It was love at first sight. What a rush! Finally discovering a new playground seemingly with a never-ending maze!

So, take a drive to Puchong 101 Mall. Remember to bring cash because DAISO does not accept credit cards. That's probably the only little pain in the @$%& they need to sort out because at RM5.00, your basket will be filled up in no time.

Happy Shopping!!

P.S. One more item I am adding to my basket, a designer cupcake courier which my cousin will be bringing back from US.

10 Most Desirable Virtues In A Man

A
Man's
10
Most

Desirable

Virtues
According to
ME

Being an only child where my father was never around means I never have the opportunity to understand the opposite sex. The women in my family had been strong, self-independent and very capable indeed. My mother raised me up on her own and my grandmother herself was a young widow. The only two men in the house were my uncles who were hardly at home.

All that changed after I got married. The BEFORE and AFTER were two worlds apart! Certainly not what I expected and anticipated.

1. Pride himself on his punctuality, he never neglects to call if he fails to be there on time. If he says he around the corner, the drive around the corner should not be half an hour later before he arrives. That is unless his car happens to have a flat or the car had engine problem. Of course all is forgiven if he is late, but arrive with a surprise.

2. Remain the wonderful husband/boyfriend he is instead of acting as your driving instructor. Please keep an open mind as to our driving style or speed. Driving should be a pleasurable task as we already lived in a fast lane. We are not denying that men are the better drivers, all we're asking is that you air your comments after we've reach the destination. The car should not be the battleground.

3. The ability to listen as if we, your ladies are the center of your cosmic world. As for my husband, he talks to himself while I talking to him. Maybe I am asking too much. In any case, I think I should stick to my intimate girlfriends if my soul needs a purging or two of any deep seated emotional distress.

4. Be a man of the 21st century. You no longer lived with your mother, whose sole responsibility was to cap the tube of toothpaste, pick up your used ear buds, collect your soiled underwear or smelly socks. In reality, your wives are mothers of her own kids whom she is desperately trying to help kick those bad habits.

5. A man who enjoys a good movie with you. Remember those romantic movies you'd watched when you were dating your man, those precious moments are now a thing of the past. Instead, you 'll be watching Steven Seagal or a Nicholas Cage flops and not the Jennifer Aniston or Anne Hathaway romantic comedy for the night. Then he wonders why there are no "cuddles" after that. Duh!

6. A man who understand that the car is not an extension of the house both of you are living in. Although my job offers me great flexibility as I could work from home but I also handle the bulk of the house chores. The start of my day ran into the gamut of..... feeding the 12 budgies, 10 Japanese Koi, the dog (feeding, walking, picking up doggy business), sending kids to school, shopping, cooking, laundering, picking kids from school, tutoring ..... I think we all get it and I hope you men out there get it too... So please have a heart and send the car for a clean up instead of saying " Why is your car so filthy when the house is not"

7. "The Disappearing Act 1" - My man has the knack of running off and forgetting to tell where he's off to. As a boy during the May 13th, his parents had to searched for him all over Bricksfield
as the night curfew was about to begin. Something about those soldiers excited him and he was actually following them not knowing they were there because of the political unrest.

8. His humor

9. His love for his family and mankind

10. His understanding, patience, undying love for ME

Hey, these are my opinions solely and do not reflect those of all the ladies out there. After all,
I am entitled to mine.

Made For Survival

For most of us who've made the choice not to have maids (I resolved to remain maid free after my one and only disappeared on a Sunday morning and never returned). Due to financial circumstances or otherwise, cleaning and keeping house can be a daunting task, especially if your kids are sensitive to household dust and allergens, you tend to become even more careful.

There are hundreds of cleaning aids out there to help you out. However, you'll need the eyesight of an eagle to read the label and if you somehow manage to get through that hurdle, you'll need a background in chemistry to understand what's in the bottle.

So how do I manage? Well, you don't need to be a rocket scientist for sure. For a start, you do need a schedule based on rotation chore timetable. Secondly, a good start-up kit, some very basic cleaning aids. You can even make them yourself (the internet offers tonnes of recipes), if not scout around for inexpensive organic brands. Finally, you need to have the determination, courage, strength and a big sense of humour.

*Magic Basket

1. Organic or good quality house hold cleaners
2. A couple of lint-free micro-fibre cloths
3. A medium size bucket and 100 % cotton/sponge mop
4. Lavatory brush and tile grout brush/baby- bottle brush
5. Sand paper block/sponge
6. micro-fibre feather duster
7. Distilled vinegar and Soda Bicarbonate powder
(Located at the baking and oil sections aisles)
8. Leftover toothpaste (any cheapy one will do)
9. Your most precious resources, your kids, maybe hubby and lots of elbow grease...
10. TIME

* HolyCow Organic, Cosway Eco-range, Ecover are a few brands available from organic outlets.
* Selley 3M, Cosway, Tesco, Ace Hardware, Jaya Jusco, Sogo, has a decent selections of micro-fibre cloths. They are available in different sizes. Large ones make good hand/face towels. They are easy to wash, fast drying and super absorbent.
*Micro-fibre/sponge mops are fine if your floor are not terracotta like mine. Mine will chew up the mop.
* Tile grout brush and baby-bottle brush looks similar to toilet brush. Slender and slightly curve at the end. Ideal for hard to reach corners of your shower cubicle and between grout.
* Sand paper block are available from good hardware shop. They remove metallic scuff mark on tile surface and hardwater ring stain in the toilet bowl. Always use them damp and be sure to rinse after using. Can be use on their own or with some soda bicarb powder for tough stains.
* A damp cloth wipe run over the micro duster first ensures every particles of dust gets wipe away.
* A 1: 10 solution of water and vinegar in a spray bottle is great for the quick touch-up. Spray onto any surface (Floor, kitchen counter, Bathroom porcelain fittings, tiles) and wipe. It helps to deodorize and remove oily residue. A small amount of vinegar in a glass jar will deodorize smell from your kitchen cabinet or fridge.
* A mixture(1:10) of essential oil eg lavender, eucalyptus, sandalwood, lemongrass and water makes your homes smelling fresh as if you have brought the outdoors in. In Sri Lanka sandalwood oil is mix with water cleans and refreshes wooden floor. Its anti-pest quality means it's a safer alternative to your petrol-based bug spray. Remember to invest in organic essential oil which is unadulterated.
* Old newspapers are still the cheapest way to bring a shine to your glass doors or window.

TIP:
Get yourself some pretty boxes or better still recycle gift boxes, shoes boxes for these emergencies. Many of the inexpensive boxes are available in myriads of design and textures. My favourite haunt is 100 YEN SHOP (Original $5.00 shop from Japan), Ace Hardware, IKEA , Sogo, Jaya Jusco, Tesco, Carrefour, smaller shops along Jalan Tuanku Abdul Rahman (gorgeous bamboo/reed baskets/boxes) . At home my collection of antique boxes/chests are left around the house to store things, from keys to toys to books and magazines.

BIGGEST TIP:
Spring clean and declutter regularly. Discipline, determination and dedication is the most important if you want to your heavenly abode to resembles those dreamy homes you see on TV. Working smart will save you precious time which you can then spend with your loved ones.

There is a saying " No one is perfect" but there is also another that says " Practice makes perfect"

Have Fun!

Holy Cow @#$%!

Would anyone believe this? I mean, how things can go wrong one after another.

First, my rear brake light unit broke off after a motorcyclist rammed into my car one morning. I even offered first aid assistance to him all while he was chastising me for braking abruptly causing him his misery.

I suddenly felt like a kid that had been spanked for a mischievous deed committed by another kid. Every other car behind me saw the little mishap and they too were not very forgiving, especially since a woman was involved. I could feel the "surround sound effects" as a result of car horns blasting from all directions telling me to move. I gritted my tongue, heaved an apology and drove away.

Back at home, I was not spared the usual interrogation. Is this a women drivers problem with men only or do men have a problem with women drivers as a whole? There had been tons of jokes about us being bad at driving, bad at reading maps and so on. My husband tells me that a woman's brain uses far less brain matter compared to that of a man when it comes to driving or operating machinery .(there is scientific proof this.) But why do I have the funny feeling that these tests were conducted men!

One week later, a newly purchased bottle of organic grapeseed oil exploded, drenching the rear passenger seat completely. Three weeks on, our efforts in washing and deodorizing the seats remain futile. The car still has that warm oily smell and it is more obvious if the days are hot.
Totally adhering to a plastic & paperless shopping motto has been my shortcoming that day. Next time, I will not refuse the cashiers offer to bag bottles with any liquid.

A fortnight following that incident, I crashed my car rolling into another as I was about to turn and exit from a road junction. To think that it could happen at a 10km driving speed was surprising. (Actually many accidents happen at that speed, my husband named it the "parking bay speed"). $150.00 compensation to the victim, and my own repair bill of $550.00 and that incident became another red mark on my driving annals among the many others.

I am not going to be intimidated by my "fall from my beloved horse". I am determined to perfect my driving skills just like how I am perfecting my mothering, child- raising, cooking, baking, home-making and etc. These things take a lifetime to master.

I realize I may not be Mrs 100 % but I will match the standard I've set. With two young audiences who are watching me at all times I have to set a good example. No resting on my laurels for me.

P.S. By the way, I chance upon the Holy Cow Organic cleaning products from USA at Ace Hardware Mid Valley, Kuala Lumpur. It is one of the most inexpensive organic stuff compared to what is currently available in premium supermarkets and organic outlets. They come in large almost 800 ml and in 3 variants for different usages. Other organic cleaning products either made in USA or Australia eg. Ecover are priced at more than $15 above. So I grab about 6 bottles just in case Ace decides to raise the price.

The "prove of the pudding test" is definitely "no lingering smell", no rushing out my shower cubicle after spraying prior to scrubbing. My son even uses the PINK Cow to wash his school shoes as his feet easily succumbs to eczema. They proudly sit alongside my home-concocted bottles of vinegar & soap, Arm & Hammer baking soda as new recruits joining my simple, non-life threatening house-keeping regime.

Not For Your Children's Eyes

It's been barely 2 days since we received news of the death of my brother-in-law's nephew in Perth.

This young man was at the prime age of 20 and would have had a bright future had he lived. His death has been a total shock to everyone in the family. His untimely death brought grief and extreme pain to the whole family. No funeral has been held yet, pending police investigation as to the cause of death. WHY the police , you may ask?

I, for one am overcome not just with grief but frustration, disgust and anger. Let me not spare you the unusual manner of how he took his life. He had utilized the Internet and its free information available from thousands of sites teaching people in despair how to end their lives by using various methods. (online euthanasia clinics)

All this boy had to get was a plastic bag and HELIUM gas, the type you get from party / balloon shops. You don't need to be a rocket scientist to rig this up and worst of all, it's not illegal.

In a world where we are bombarded daily with news of cyclones, earthquakes, famine and sickness, we don't need children dying like this. There needs to be some form of check and balance webmasters and Internet providers have to employ before anything of this nature is posted for the world to see.

This has been done successfully with child pornography sites in most countries and I don't see why sites that encourage taking your life should be any different. Please understand that I am only talking about not allowing children to have access to these sites.

The stress of living daily can take its toll on each and everyone of us. When we feel intimidated, frustrated and very often feel like the whole world is collapsing around us, we need to voice our feelings and thoughts to someone. Unfortunately. most of the time, seeking help itself intimidates us, we lose our inner voice and try to find alternatives. Sometimes not the right ones. And in the case of this young man a fatal one.

I will not surround my two precious children with colorful beanbags to cushion them from the realities of life. Nor am I going to ban the INTERNET or SAT TV.

Like my husband says, we don't live in the sticks and we are not hermits , therefore I will guide them through the rivers, ravines, hills and mountains as much as I can and to the best of my knowledge, teaching them everything I know about the life's troubles & joys.

We, in Kuala Lumpur will grief together with our family members in Australia.

May God bless us with faith, peace, hope and love.

To Be or Not To Be .... Organic

Lately, the emergence of food safety issue has affected many countries worldwide, including Malaysia. Undeniably, there are many loopholes existing in our system which our government is trying to plug. As consumers, we are never sure what we will be getting in our boxes. I guess Forest Gump knows it better and said "Life is like a box of chocolate, you never know what you are going to get". At least he got a box of chocolate which have the FDA approval.

Malaysia have tons of natural resources/produces that we are proud of eg. petroleum, natural gas, forest timber, palm oil, rubber and others. Unfortunately we also rely heavily on imported goods such as fruits, vegetables, rice, wheat, beef, lamb, dairy and yes the list does go on. Second grade fresh produce are often sold in our "pasar sayur" while the best one are sent across to our neighbour which is Singapore. Stringent health and safety regulations in Singapore determine that only those that passed the test be sold there. There had been countless times when truck loads of produce has been denied entry into Singapore and there after many months of ban till a permittable pesticide level had been reach.

In any case, our relevant safety and health department is on the crackdown of all dairy- based food items in view of the SANLU Milk scare. Everything or anything made with milk is under scrutiny. We even receive SMS's warning us not to eat fruits or vegetables originating from CHINA. Fuji apples, Gong pears, Fragrant pears, peaches, Beijing cabbages, Baby bak choy, Pea sprouts, Snow peas, Hongkong kale, mustard .....

Obviously if you are a vegetarian, life has just become more difficult. Anyway, if you have read my last post, it would not be difficult to guess that my family have been gradually going organic.

It started with my son, Siddharth who could not tolerate cow's milk as it aggravates his sinus problem. Out goes cans of powdered milk, packs of UHT milk to be replaced with organic oat milk from Canada. At one point, we even tried RAW fresh milk delivered by our Indian Milkman ( Local indians and punjabis who are dairy farmers who supplies fresh milk and yoghurt to household ).

10 years ago, going organic would have been impossible and unthinkable. Now, we have a large organic section in our BV Grocer in Bangsar, Country Farm Organic , BMS organic, Justlife Organic and many well-stocked smaller ones all over Kuala Lumpur. I, especially like the one in Taman Desa called DE Health Paradise Organic where their prices are great and they have a good selection of ready cooked meals at fantastic prices.

In the end, we are ensured that what we eat and what our children eat has not been compromised. We, of course, grief with those parents who have lost their child due to tainted milk or contaminated food where officials have not acted to the urgency of their complain until it is too late.

As mothers, parents we do our best to protect our children. After all, they are our future.